Do You Feel Inadequate Online?

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*via pinterest

This post probably comes as no surprise given the recent uproar regarding social media being ‘fake’, how inadequate it can make you feel and how consuming the whole online world can be at times. I’ve felt it (in a vague sense, more on that later) and I’m sure you have to, so in today’s rather ranty post, that’s exactly what we’ll be discussing. Grab a cuppa, it’s gonna be a long one.

I’ve been blogging for three and a half years now, which is a long time to be blathering on about what outfit you’re wearing or what lipstick you’re into, and I’ve watched the online world (mostly social media) change a lot in this time. When I first started this blog, it was a place to dump everything that was in my head, or the things I was obsessed with or just bought, so I didn’t end up being disowned by my friends and family for going on and on. I also quite like writing, hence doing a journalism degree and being in a job where content is a crucial part of my day to day role. Social media was (and still is to an extent) a place for people to connect and chat and share, to be you and nothing else.

I still maintain this and try to stay as genuine as possible on this blog, but I would say at times it’s hard. Part of me often wants to do what the ‘popular’ blogs are doing, to emulate their style as it’s something I really admire, to adopt the way others write, to get that perfectly contoured and highlighted selfie angle and not quit until I’ve achieved it, to decorate my home for the sake of pinterest and to pretend I lead a whimsical bloody life so people think I’m interesting.

But then I think – why? Why do I need to do this to impress people I don’t know on the internet? Sure, I can be proud of my work and be happy, but I don’t need to prove anything to anyone. I would like to think people read my blog because they are, for some bizarre reason, interested in what I have to say. Or they like my photos. Or my outfits (as boring as they may be) and that they’re not here to judge or harshly criticise. I don’t need to live a fake life to ‘make it’ (which can be any definition of the word you choose) and I, 100%, choose to share what I want to share and it’s an honest reflection of who I am. 

It’s quite easy to be swept up in the online world, to see these perfect girls with their perfect skin and their perfectly flat stomachs and feel bad about yourself. Or see someone’s well executed and wonderfully decorated living room and be insanely jealous. Or to see a blog post that’s so beautiful that it makes you feel a bit ill and you think you’ll never be able to achieve that in a million years so why don’t you just quit now. That’s all natural and it’s all human nature.

But what I will say is feeling inadequate only lasts for a second if you learn to push it to one side. You are beautiful, you are talented and you have a lot to offer. You may not take photos as good as that girl and that’s ok, you still bring so much to the table and you can learn to use your camera any day you like. You can practice your writing. You can tweet whatever you fancy. You can publish any selfie you please because you are still a person who matters and that’s all that matters. You don’t need to be someones ‘goals’. And you definitely don’t need to impress people on a social media platform that may be completely irrelevant in five years time, so please don’t worry, compare or punish yourself if you can help it.

Just keep blogging, keep sharing what you love, keep tweeting about your life because that’s what’s important. You can choose what collaboration to accept or deny and whether you want to put up that sponsored post or not. You can say yes and you can just as easily say no. The competitiveness and jealousy that the online world often brings is temporary and it’s up to you whether it bothers you or not. Don’t be bitter, be better.

You are in charge of your individual online space and you have something to offer. Always remember that.

Check out my Autumn makeup giveaway – win the UD Naked 3 Palette, Benefit Sugarlicious set + more.

Helen x
ps. Check out these blogs: Ayelined and Reserved for Ruby.

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