I'm aware these are the most Summery photos ever, but I found them in the drafts and they felt like a bit of a waste if I didn't share them. So, let's just pretend that they're Autumnal. Shall I photoshop in some leaves or a hot chocolate? Let's use our imagination, people.
Anyway, on to today's ramble, do you ever find yourself in a situation where you wish you could just say what's on your mind? Whether it's socially acceptable or not? Me too. There's been a few incidents recently, so I thought I'd write down ten things I honestly wish I could just say. This is obviously very tongue-in-cheek, fyi.
No, I don't want to hold your baby
I don't know about you, but I'm a little bit hit and miss when dealing with children. I was totally fine with my niece and nephew and used to spend a lot of time looking after them when they were teeny, but when it comes to other people's children... I'd rather you just kept a hold of them, especially if they're going to scream. Please take your child away. Thank you.
Just give me the job
Have you ever applied for a job and wanted to be perfectly honest with them in your interview? Like, Sandra, let's be real here. You know I've done everything on the job description, I'd bake them cakes every week and definitely not nick someone else's lunch out of the fridge. I'd try super hard and basically be a solid 10/10 at the job, so can you just bloody give me it already?
Can you just pay me for the love of god
Have you ever been talking to a super chatty PR while you're doing the work, going out of your way to have contracts signed on time and work done to the date they've said? It's great, they love it and now you send over your invoice... and are met with silence. As someone who hates noise, usually I'd be grateful for this, but digital silence is the worst when I've got bills to pay. The PR gets paid on time, so why shouldn't I? If the invoice says 30 days, then in 30 days time, guess what? I should be paid.
Get over it or do something about it
Now, I don't mean this in a nasty way, but do any of you have that friend who does the same things over and over again yet complains every time? I have one in particular and I honestly want to shake them and say a) this is your fault b) nothing changes if you don't c) you can't have your cake and eat it d) get over it or do something about it. JESUS.
Please just hurry the eff up
Now, I'm quite a chilled person at times but nothing makes me go from 0-100% rage than being held up. Please, stop dawdling (or if you know you are, have some self awareness). If you need help, then ask for it. Get your purse out before you get to the check out. Get your ticket out before getting to the gate (this drives me mad in London!). Come on, people.
Stop buying followers, we can all see that you're doing it
I don't know why people think others are so oblivious to this, but if you're going from 100 likes a post to 1000 likes a post and you're comments are all 'love it' and that 100 emoji, we're gonna take a wild guess that something isn't quite right. We all know the algorithm isn't exactly working in our favour these days, so ain't no one gonna believe you've gained 500-1k a day naturally unless you already have a large following. If you've bought followers and then write posts about how you 'organically' gained your readership, then please get in the sea. Oh and social blade exists, you do know that right?
Can you get your dog down please
Some of you will 100% disagree with me on this and I will say I am a cat person above anything, but sometimes I just want your dog to get off me. Now, I love dogs, they're adorable. But they also smell and slobber and shed their doggie hairs everywhere and no I don't want it to lick my hand or worse yet, my face, so can you please just get your dog down. Thanks.
Please control your child
I get it, parenting is hard. When I look after my niece and nephew, I am physically and mentally drained. They're exhausting. However, they need looking after so I do just that as it's what I signed up for as an aunt. It honestly blows my mind how some kids treat their parents these days and I hope some get control over their kids before they hit their teens!
No, no and hell no
No, I don't want to spend time with your boring friends. No, I don't want to make tea, I'd rather sit on the sofa and do nothing. No Sharon, that task is boring as shit and I think you should offload it onto someone else. Have you ever wanted to say these things? Me too. I started saying no more often over the last few years and I honestly believe life is too short, but god I wish it was acceptable to say no in all circumstances! I don't think it would go down well at work though.
Now, I'm not saying my content is innovative. We're all inspired by trends - hello marble and brass - but there's a fine line between taking influence from something and twisting it into something that's more your style and outright copying. I've seen so many bloggers look like carbon copies of each other (and yet claim they're original or that other girls are stealing their style when they took it from somewhere else, no hun) and it's making the blogging world a bit of a shitty place. I'm so glad so many are saying 'fuck it' to those perfect instagram accounts and are posting whatever the hell they like, as it's such a wonderful breath of fresh air amongst those girls who you couldn't pick out in a line up.
What do you wish you could say to people?